We've seen plenty of weird crime mugshots and heard plenty of bizarre stories. But when it comes to criminal names, this one is ... a mouthful.

Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop, 30, was arrested Thursday afternoon on charges of carrying a concealed weapon, possession of drug paraphernalia, possession of marijuana and a violation of probation in Madison, Wisc.

Zopittybop-Bop-Bop was born Jeffrey Drew Wilschke, according to court records unearthed by the Capital Times. He legally changed his name to Beezow Doo-Doo Zoopittybop-Bop-Bop in October.

According to Zopittybop-Bop-Bop's apparent Facebook account, when he's not in trouble with the law he enjoys activities including "eating," "standing," walking," "thinking," and "diamond." He's also single... so there's that, ladies.

Zopittybop-Bop-Bop was apprehended by authorities after neighbors complained of "excessive drinking and drug use" around a local park, the Madison police report says.

Police say that when they took Zopittybop-Bop-Bop into custody, they found him in possession of marijuana, drug paraphernalia, and a knife.

On his way to the prison, Zopittybop-Bop-Bop allegedly told cops that he would eventually "get even with them."

An Oak Creek police officer who responded to a report of a goat running loose in traffic discovered two things: the goat was actually a lamb, and a lamb on the lam is hard to corral.

According to Oak Creek police, a caller reported that a goat was running northbound in traffic on South Ash Street and East Rawson Avenue around 12:40 p.m. Dec. 9.

The officer responding to the call reported the animal was actually a lamb, and believed it belonged to the petting zoo at Mega Discount Nursery, 1901 Rawson Ave.

The officer tried to assist nursery employees who were trying to corral the lamb, but he was unable to secure it before leaving the area.

Employees at the nursery continued to follow the lamb, who led them on a two-hour chase through yards, over fences and across streets.

Police had to help remove a 170-pound white-tailed deer that crashed into a Janesville motel.

Officers were called Thursday morning after people saw a male deer running around a parking lot and ramming into cars at a Target store. The deer then ran across a highway, vaulted through a closed, ground-level window and entered a room at a Super 8 Motel.

The manager says the room was empty.

Authorities removed the deer shortly before noon.

Thanks to The Wisconsin Times for sharing this story!

Madison police went to great heights to capture a suspected auto thief on the city's south side on Friday.

An officer using a thermal imaging camera was hoisted up and over a marsh on a fire department ladder truck, enabling other officers to find the man hiding in tall grass and make the arrest.

Jason Stahelski, 30, Madison, was tentatively charged with operating a motor vehicle without the owner's consent and resisting arrest following his arrest Friday morning in a woody, wet area north of a stretch of stores, restaurants and motels on the West Beltline Highway access road.

According to the police report, an officer recognized a car parked in a lot near Culver's 2102 W. Beltline Hwy., as having been stolen from a Park Street restaurant lot on Thursday.

"As the officer went to investigate, the car's driver fled on foot," said police spokesman Joel DeSpain. "The officer gave chase into a wooded, grassy, marshy area until the sounds of the fleeing suspect went quiet."

Enter the Madison Fire Department with a ladder truck.

"Firefighters put another officer in a position to have a bird's-eye view of the situation, leaving the suspect with no place to run again without being spotted," DeSpain said.

The officer approached the scene cautiously. As well he should have, after all this was Sunday afternoon, the 22nd of May, in the year 2011, the day after the predicted Rapture. There had been no horrible earthquake, and it did not appear - as the sun rose again Sunday - that Armageddon was upon us.

Still, this “check property” call to which the officer had been dispatched seemed strange. A concerned citizen made the initial discovery: it was on the tallest hill of Olin Turville park. There, in a small clearing, beneath a canopy of towering oaks, were multiple “sets of clothes.” Not just any clothes, but clothes that appeared to be burned.

Was it not part of the Rapture prognostication, that on worldwide judgment day, Jesus would take believers to heaven?

Around 4:30 p.m., the officer advised dispatch that he was on scene and “commencing my investigation.” In his report, he writes: “I had originally thought that the burned clothes may have been a scorned lover affecting revenge on a party they deemed had wronged them, but it quickly became apparent that this did not appear to be the case.”

Indeed. There were some 30 sets of clothes. You could almost make out the figures that once wore them. Men’s clothes, women’s clothes, complete with undergarments and shoes. It was if people had been on their backs and vanished in their birthday suites, leaving all material possessions behind. There were wrist watches where arms should have been, and sets of keys in pockets.

“I observed that … all outfits … were perfectly laid out as if the people wearing them had met with some sort of forceful and immediate action,” wrote the responding officer. He also noted all clothing “had varying levels of what appeared to be burns or melting as if exposed to some sort of intense heat source.”

More mystifying was the fact that the material goods were spread out, in circular fashion, around a black cylinder which was emitting a strobe-type white light toward the skies. “I cautiously examined the Beacon of Light closer and determined that it had been constructed out of a 5-gallon pail and what appeared to be a light fixture type of top,” said the officer. As he probed the probe he discovered two independent light sources: a heavy duty flash light, and a bicycle light.

Next the officer said, “I donned a pair of protective gloves and examined some of the clothing and discovered that several pockets in the outfits all contained a similar type of business or calling card. The top of each had a round circle, and directly beneath that was a large vessel that appeared to be an ‘Ark’ type craft. Under the ‘Ark’ were several vertical lines that emanated downward away from the bottom of the craft.”

The officer called a sergeant to also view the findings. In the end they were left with three possible scenarios: Could this be an unregistered art exhibit? Could this be a practical joke? Or, could this be … a possible documented "Rapture" occurrence.

Did you ever want to play dead on an airport runway? The Dane County Regional Airport could give you the chance.

Airport officials are putting out the call for volunteers to act as victims during an aircraft disaster exercise scheduled for Tuesday, June 14 at the airport.

The exercise will begin at 7 a.m. and run until 1:30 p.m.

Practically every law enforcement and emergency medical services unit in the area will take part in the exercise, from first responders to the Red Cross.

The Federal Aviation Administration requires disaster exercises at airports every three years to make sure emergency personnel react quickly to an accident.

"Officials use this exercise to focus on testing communications, aircraft and victim rescue, firefighting capability and aircraft operations during a disaster, and how different agencies work together," airport spokesman Brent McHenry said in a news release about the exercise.

Volunteers are needed to act as mock patients and to play other roles in the exercise.

No actual injuries are incurred and no actual medications are administered, but other than that, the exercise will be as realistic as possible.

"The event will be highly structured and will involve active rescue scenes," McHenry said. "Many Dane County agencies will be involved with field triage and treatment and simulated transport to receiving facilities."

Volunteers must be at least 18 years old and have a valid Wisconsin driver's license, or be accompanied by an adult if under 18.

For more information or to register as a volunteer, go here.

When the instrument, valued at $5,000 to $7,000, was brought into the Pawn America store, 2301 East Springs Drive, on Thursday afternoon, store personnel got suspicious and called police.

The young men selling the sax also were trying to sell a Superscope CD player, valued at about $500.

"Officers took control of the property after one young man offered that the items were obtained in some sort of nefarious trade," said police spokesman Joel DeSpain.

No arrests were made.

Police say a Madison woman texted her 55-year-old sister that her husband hit her and she was going to hit him back.

The sister reacted by calling 911, not only because of the text but because she said there likely was a gun in the house.

Police spokesman Joel DeSpain says the sister quickly called back 911 after learning her sister fooled her.

But he says police continued because it isn’t uncommon for one of the parties in a domestic disturbance to try to dissuade police from responding.

Three officers responded on Friday and DeSpain says the sister who sent the text was very apologetic.

• A Janesville man started a fight at a bar because someone called him a Justin Bieber look-alike. He was ticketed for disorderly conduct.

• A driver was ticketed after revving his engine and squealing his tires. He told the officer, "I got pissed that my car died, so I gunned it."

• A young boy called 911 because he wanted his father to go to jail. The dad had done nothing illegal.

• A disorderly conduct complaint was made after a 10-year-old boy began banging on things and defecating in his room.

• A Janesville man stole his grandma's car and damaged it. He was arrested.

Ted Sullivan can be reached at (608) 755-8253, tsullivan@gazettextra.com or follow him on Twitter or Facebook at Rock County Crime.