We've seen plenty of weird crime mugshots and heard plenty of bizarre stories. But when it comes to criminal names, this one is ... a mouthful.

Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop, 30, was arrested Thursday afternoon on charges of carrying a concealed weapon, possession of drug paraphernalia, possession of marijuana and a violation of probation in Madison, Wisc.

Zopittybop-Bop-Bop was born Jeffrey Drew Wilschke, according to court records unearthed by the Capital Times. He legally changed his name to Beezow Doo-Doo Zoopittybop-Bop-Bop in October.

According to Zopittybop-Bop-Bop's apparent Facebook account, when he's not in trouble with the law he enjoys activities including "eating," "standing," walking," "thinking," and "diamond." He's also single... so there's that, ladies.

Zopittybop-Bop-Bop was apprehended by authorities after neighbors complained of "excessive drinking and drug use" around a local park, the Madison police report says.

Police say that when they took Zopittybop-Bop-Bop into custody, they found him in possession of marijuana, drug paraphernalia, and a knife.

On his way to the prison, Zopittybop-Bop-Bop allegedly told cops that he would eventually "get even with them."

Madison police didn't have to work too hard to track down this pair of unlucky thieves.

Authorities said two Madison men, ages 29 and 28, stole DVDs and computer games from a Target store Tuesday afternoon. As they drove away they discussed their plans to sell the stolen goods.

But they didn't realize that one of them had accidentally pocket-dialed 911, allowing a dispatcher to listen in on nearly an hour of conversation. The two spoke in detail about what they had stolen and where they might sell it, and they also described their getaway vehicle.

Madison police spokesman Joel DeSpain said the pair decided to sell their goods at a video store. When they pulled into the store's parking lot, officers surrounded their vehicle with guns drawn.

Someone is playing an elaborate prank on a 29-year-old East Side man, who said he has had chicken-themed items strewn on his porch and roof monthly for the past year. There have been chicken bones, chicken feet and Popeyes chicken containers.

“In August, I had a printer thrown on my roof, a fan, a bunch of Bob Marley postcards in my mailbox — just really weird stuff. A vacuum cleaner left on top of my shed. Strange,” said the Drexel Avenue man, who said he wanted to remain anonymous to avoid further victimization.

Trying to get to the bottom of the situation, the man set up a security camera and on Halloween night caught the perpetrator on camera dressed as a giant chicken and dropping off Popeyes items.

Two young Milwaukee women were arrested this week after an 18-year-old Arizona man--who traveled to Wisconsin by bus after meeting one of the suspects online--told cops that he was held captive in the duo’s apartment for two days and slashed and stabbed more than 300 times as part of an apparent satanic sex ritual.

...kinda makes you long for the boring days of Stripper Fights in Fond du Lac

A 17-year-old has been arrested and charged with drug possession after a friend posted on the teen's Facebook page that he needed drugs.

A police officer also recognized the two from a video of a drug party in June.

A Greenfield police officer was patrolling in his car Aug. 30 when he noticed two men he recognized from his assignment as a police school liaison officer at Greenfield High School. Earlier in the day, he had seen one of them post a statement on the other's Facebook page that indicated he wanted drugs. The teen behind the page, Justin J. Cervera, had replied, asking the guy to call him.

The same officer had previously seen a video of the two apparently smoking marijuana with other juveniles in June 2011, called "Reefer party for my birthday."

He stopped the two on the street and Cervera emptied his pockets, revealing a white prescription bottle with drugs. Cervera was arrested and was charged Thursday with possession of narcotics and marijuana. He faces up to four years in prison and $11,000 in fines.

The settings on the teens' Facebook pages have since been changed so most information, including pictures and videos, are private.

When Jordan Cardella's girlfriend broke up with him, he figured his best shot at getting her back was literally a shot.

So he asked his friends to shoot him, and one did exactly that. Seeing him in pain certainly would cause the young woman to have a change of heart and take him back, right?

Not even close. The ex-girlfriend did not come to visit the 20-year-old South Milwaukee man in the hospital as he had hoped. Police, however, did stop by.

At a sentencing hearing for the shooter this month, Milwaukee County Assistant District Attorney Christopher Rawsthorne said he meant no disrespect, but "this has to be the most phenomenally stupid case that I have seen. It's unbelievable what happened here."

Michael C. Wezyk and his lawyer didn't disagree.

"I mean, sorry to bring something so stupid into your courtroom," Wezyk, 24, of Cudahy, told Circuit Judge Rebecca Dallet. Wezyk pleaded guilty to a reduced charge of injury by negligent use of a dangerous weapon, a felony.

The judge sentenced him to two years' probation and 100 hours of community service, and at a separate hearing this month, gave the same sentence to Anthony D. Woodall, 20, of South Milwaukee, a friend of Cardella who lined up Wezyk to do the shooting. Woodall was convicted of the same felony as party to a crime. If they both complete probation successfully, the court will consider a motion to expunge this offense from their records.

So far, Cardella has gotten off easiest, if you don't count pain and suffering. Initially, he was charged with obstructing police by lying about what happened, but that charge was dismissed. There's a notation in the court file that the state planned to reissue a felony charge of some kind against him, but the district attorney's office said Tuesday that's unlikely to happen.

The criminal complaint and sentencing transcript tell the story. It begins in January when Cardella shared his plan with Woodall. They would make it look like Cardella was attacked by some bad guys. Woodall would call the ex-girlfriend and tell her Cardella had been shot, which was supposed to make her feel sorry for him.

Cardella, a felon, didn't want to shoot himself because felons aren't supposed to handle firearms. Woodall refused to do the shooting, but he called Wezyk and asked him to do it in exchange for payment in money or pain pills.

Everybody piled into a car. "They drove to a bar in search of a firearm, but eventually went back to Wezyk's residence where Wezyk retrieved a rifle. They drove around for a while to find a place to shoot Cardella, and eventually decided at the location of Beech Street at the Oak Creek Parkway in South Milwaukee," the complaint says.

Wezyk stood 7 to 8 feet from Cardella and asked if he was sure he wanted to be shot.

"Cardella said he was and asked Wezyk to shoot him in the back three times," the complaint says.

That sounds like way more shooting than a guy might need to win back a girlfriend. Cardella also had talked about wanting to be shot in the chest. I couldn't reach him by phone to ask about all this, and he did not return a Facebook message.

The complaint says, "Wezyk then shot Cardella in the arm, and Cardella immediately slumped over. He asked to be shot again, but Wezyk stated, 'I'm done.' "

Now that was wise on his part.

Wezyk took the rifle home, and Cardella and Woodall headed for Aurora St. Luke's South Shore Hospital for treatment and to watch their story unravel.

Prosecutor Rawsthorne told the judge there was one more thing. While awaiting the outcome of this case, Woodall and Wezyk went to deliver marijuana to someone, but it turned out to be grass clippings and/or catnip. The victim complained to police.

Judge Dallet told Wezyk at sentencing that he was lucky Cardella didn't die. She recalled another case in her courtroom involving a guy shot in the arm. The bullet then traveled on, right through his heart.

"What were you thinking?" she asked Wezyk.

"I wasn't," he replied.

ELKHORN — A 33-year-old Delavan woman wants $350,000 for her claim that she was infected with genital herpes by a 35-year-old Edgerton man during a sexual tryst in Janesville, according to Walworth County court records.

The woman contends in her lawsuit that the man was legally liable for knowingly exposing an uninfected and unknowing partner to the sexually transmitted disease.

The sexual encounter happened after the couple had spent the day together in Madison, according to the lawsuit.

The woman was married when she had sex with the man, and he was married, too, according to the lawsuit. Neither could be reached for comment.

Recent reports of fisticuffs between members of the Supreme Court call to mind a violent day under the Capitol dome in 1842, when one lawmaker gunned down another on the floor of the Legislature.

During debate, Charles Arndt of Green Bay implied that fellow member James Vineyard had lied on behalf of a political appointee. According to the press, Vineyard responded with "violent and insulting language."

The session was quickly adjourned, but during the break Arndt approached Vineyard's desk and "requested him to retract, which he refused to do, repeating the offensive words." Arndt then raised his hand and hit Vineyard in the head.

Concealed carry was the status quo in territorial Wisconsin, and before anyone could stop him Vineyard "stepped back a pace, drew a pistol, and shot him dead." Arndt reeled back and fell to the floor, dying where he had fallen, about five minutes later.

English novelist Charles Dickens was touring the United States at the time and cited the incident in his book, American Notes, as an example of the "revolting evidences of the state of society" on the American frontier.

The Territorial Council expelled Vineyard, but after a change of venue from Dane County to his own district in Green County, he was tried and acquitted the next year.

Despite having murdered Arndt, Vineyard was elected to represent the Lead Region at the 1846 Constitutional Convention and was re-elected to the Legislature in 1849. In 1850 he followed the Gold Rush to California, where he died in 1863.

- Wisconsin Historical Society, www.wisconsinhistory.org

Firefighters freed a Fond du Lac man Tuesday after he got his hand stuck in a car while retrieving a Snickers candy bar.

At 12:19 p.m. Tuesday, firefighters and police were called to the area of Western Avenue and South Brooke Street to rescue Earr Stokes, 20.

His cousin, Tyrone Williams, said he and Stokes took the car to a business at 222 Brooke St. to get a tire changed.

"He happened to look in the gas tank. There was chocolate in there. (Stokes) tried to get it out. He started picking it out with his hand and his hand got stuck," Williams said.

Williams said someone removed the Snickers bar from the wrapper and jammed it in the tank.

"It was just chocolate. Chocolate and peanuts," Williams said.

"He's hurting," Williams added while glancing over at his cousin who was attempting to pry his hand out of the tank with the help of firefighters.

Capt. Tony Knecht said firefighters resorted to cutting the filler pipe. Firefighters were then able to access the backside of the gas tank opening to release Stokes' fingers.

"He got some abrasions on his finger," Knecht said. "It's nothing serious."

Firefighters wrapped Stokes in a blanket and placed a jacket on him as a cutting machine was used on the car.

"The only concern was the possibility of a spark with the fuel tank," Knecht said.

One firefighter kneeled nearby with a fire hose in case the rescue went awry.

After being freed, Stokes slowly walked into a nearby ambulance where emergency personnel helped remove the pipe.

***The best quote "The only concern was the possibility of a spark with the fuel tank," Capt. Tony Knecht said.